La Mia Passione Eterna

I can't go any longer without confessing this; I think I've done a wow job keeping it to myself this long in fact... But I have an enduring passion that will just not go away. I'm not even sure if it's a passion - more like an obsession. The fact that I just now typed the word 'obsession' as 'exception' also indicates that this passion/obsession has also grown to such a degree that it is now seriously threatening my mental capacity. In other words, I can't think straight anymore. The thing is, since the moment it first touched my lips, surprising, delighting and transforming me forever, I have loved chocolate. I can't remember a time in my life when I wasn't eating it. The only two times I remember being without it (Orthodox Easter holy week aside), were last autumn and 10 years ago, both times for 3-month detox periods - and I hated it. So I've decided to accept this fatal flaw in my character, rather like I accept that I am a cat, not a bird person, and that no matter what time I get up in the morning I will always stay up late.

Ah mysterious, exotic, powerful, sexy CHOCOLATE! No matter what you're eating, drinking or smearing over your body, chocolate always adds that something 'extra' to the mix. It turns boring biscuits into choc-chip cookies, boring housewives into sex cookies and rebellious children into PUTTY. If I had my way, there would be an International Chocolate Day, a chocolaterie in every town and a chocolate dessert after every restaurant meal. Instead of attaching cards to gifts, I would make it proper etiquette to strap on a box of Ferrero Rocher instead. Instead of champagne (or, actually, as well as champagne) at the start of fancy parties... you guessed it, chocolate pralines; passed around by the trayful. Even wedding vows would begin, "I do solemnly eclair..."

I wish I had a suitably delicious chocolate recipe to add right here but unfortunately I'm an expert at the eating, not the making. However, if you've ever tried mixing mascarpone cream with Nutella, throwing in ground hazelnuts and eating with vanilla ice-cream, you would be trying one of my specialties. If poor, you could try mixing MILO powder with milk to make a thick paste, then mix in ground wallnuts and refrigerate. That makes something you could suck and munch on for hours. And if you're after something more refined, you have to try the dark chocolate Callebaut makes. Smooth and earthy and probably full of endorphins and aphrodisiac properties (I'm guessing, because unfortunately I have no man at the moment that I can jump on after eating it to really put its chemical prowess to the test).

I don't need to tell anyone I'm pathetic when it comes to recipes. It's evident! I just like to eat the stuff. And to be honest, whenever I've got my hands on a nice chunk of choc, passion and lust take over so intensely that it disappears before I've had time to think up some new ways to serve it. So if anyone reading this has the self-control and patience that I lack and has some nice chocky recipes you'd like to share, I promise I won't bite until I've given what you suggest a try. Original ideas are welcomed. I invite you to gain fame by plastering your chocolate knowledge and experience across the Blogosphere; which, if I had my way, would be the Chocosphere.

I'm so bloody predictable.